My relationship with the internet

reyna... do some volunteer work, get a job, anything, but the the fuck off your computer! i'm concerned. anyone can stalk you. you're a blogger and you're obsessed. that's lame... what about real physical contact..? you text a lot. why are you always on the internet? why do you go on blogtv? blah blah blah. fuck you all. hahahah. let me live my life.. even though i'm not doing much with it right now.


The Urban Word of the Day last Thursday was Social Notworking. Pretty good timing on their part, since I was just thinking this week about how much I got on social networking sites while I'm at school. I'm always tweeting during geography lectures, facebooking in my math class, and youtubing when I get bored elsewhere. (Yes, I managed to turn those site names into verbs). Regardless where I am, I always have some sort of interaction with the internet world. People have told me I'm on my computer way too much, and that I should be doing something better with my time. They ask why I have so many accounts on online websites. [As opposed to offline websites?] They tell me I have an addiction. Even in person, they say I talk like I'm on a computer. (Whatever that means). Even my mom asks why I'm always here. She should know the answer to that better than anyone, but I guess she doesn't see it.

Why are you always on your computer, Reyna? I'm not sure. I don't think it's an addiction, though. It's just something I got used to over time. I remember when I was around eight years old and would go into chat rooms, play online games on Pogo, and whatever else I did. I always liked the internet; it gave me something to do at home. I was never one to go out and play sports, or hang out with a big group of friends. Middle school was sort of the same way. Except I had things like drill team practice, after school classes, and little things to keep me busy and away from home. Away from a computer. Plus, my time online was limited to one hour per day. Regardless, I always enjoyed my time online back then too. It mostly consisted of me going into Pokémon RPG's or chat rooms to talk about Harry Potter and whatever else I was into back then. Sometime in 8th grade, I got DSL and the amount of time I spent online was no longer limited. I began to spend more time on my computer since I was never much of a social person anyway. I never had money, and my parents would rarely let me go out. (Not that I'd get invited many places anyway.) I mean, I was barely allowed to go to the Tower Dance -- my middle school version of the prom -- that year. I eventually had enough time on my hands to learn the basics of web design and a little photoshopping. By the time I was a sophomore in high school, the internet had changed and reached out to pretty much everyone I knew thanks to a man named Tom Anderson. I was glad everyone was in on it nowadays, but also a little bothered because the internet always seemed to be my thing; not everyone else's. Whenever I wasn't busy with school, homework, or band practice I would usually be at my computer desk contacting people, working on layouts, or finding new little addictions here and there. Since I had joined marching band I had a lot less time to be online, but I saw that as a good thing. It gave me something to do and an excuse to use when I wanted my parents to let me go somewhere. Sometimes I wouldn't even tell them I was going anywhere and they'd simply assume I was at rehearsal. It was great. Nonetheless, I still had enough time left on my hands to be considered a computer junkie. I got a little better at coding and photoshopping, but was still pretty much a newb at web design. (I still kinda am.) I even made a website for the percussion ensemble and all.

Today, I'm not too into web design and all that. For a long time, I wanted to major in computer science. Then I came to realize that it was a hobby more than anything. I didn't really enjoy making websites for other people most of the time. It was such a drag. The whole internet thing was just something I liked doing for myself. I guess I grew up with my computer and the internet because I had nothing better to do sometimes. My computer was just always here. It just became sort of a daily routine to go on it as soon as I got finished eating dinner, or completed my homework.

People have asked why I tweet, blog, and constantly update my status on Facebook. Who cares what I'm doing? Who really gives a crap that I just had an awesome carne asada burrito from Yuri's, or that I have a Jason Mraz song stuck in my head? A friend of mine once described social networking websites as places where "people write stuff pretending that other people care, and other people reply to it pretending they care." This may or may not be true, pretending on the type of person you are. It's not so much that people should care about what one posts. Many simply read it for the sake of entertainment. Even if you don't really care about your friend tweeting that he was in a public restroom and got mad that the person next to her didn't have a square to spare*, you might still have a little laugh inside of you making fun of that friend, or even send them an @reply saying something like "lol! i hate it when that happens!" Sure, you can always talk about these things in person. Fact of the matter is, you don't get to see most of your friends every minute of every day. Sometimes you really do care, and use these websites as a form of keeping up with old friends or people whom you've never met but get along with anyway.

People get the idea that I use social networking websites as a means of socializing or making any sort of human contact. I don't. Really. Nothing can replace having real physical contact with people. If I want to hang out with a friend, I tell them. The only people I don't really get to do this with are those that have moved somewhere far away (usually 'cause they went to another college), or the ones I met on websites like BlogTV or a forum whom I might never even meet in my life. But seriously, I wouldn't prefer IMing a friend over hanging out with them. That would be kinda sad. I only contact them online when it's convenient. That's it.

How big a part of me has the internet become? I guess it's pretty big nowadays. I rely on the internet for most things I wonder about. If someone asks me a question that I don't know the answer to, I usually respond with "Google it." If they ask me something via instant message, I link them to justfuckinggoogleit.com. Hahaha. Unless I'm in a good mood, then I just find out the answer for them. I regularly log on to my accounts on Facebook and Twitter. I don't go on my MySpace every day anymore, but I check it about 3-4 times a week. I rely on YouTube for tutorials on pretty much anything, whether it be Photoshop-related or something for my math homework. I occasionally make video blogs. I take a photo every day for my DailyBooth account. Whenever someone asks me what kind of music I listen to, I just link them to my Last.fm account. Internet just makes my life that much easier. If someone uses an acronym or slang term that I don't know the meaning to, I consult Urban Dictionary. I go to answers.com for every other word I don't know the meaning of. You name it, I know a website that can do it.

I just hope none of you think this is my life. It's not. I've just been spending more time than usual here 'cause I'm not involved in any activity at school and don't have a job (yet!). Hopefully this changes within the next few months. For now, I'll just stick to my computer junkie/community-college-student-that-doesn't-go-out-much life. It's not an obsession, I just can't get the hell out of my house sometimes.

* Kudos to you if you actually got that "square to spare" Seinfeld reference!